When I was viewing an inspirational video about self-care the other night, I was overcome with emotion. The tears would not stop. From experience, I knew that usually meant I had some inner work to do. Forgiveness echoed in my thoughts.
So I acknowledged the elephant in the room, and using the Ho’oponopono Prayer, I offered my apologies. I gratefully received the forgiveness I so badly needed. Without forgiveness, I could not keep moving forward. I share my story here to encourage you on your forgiveness journey.
Without Forgiveness, History Repeats
I have lived for decades believing that taking time for self-care was inconvenient for my family, therefore, it was a bad thing. I was forbidden from spending any money, especially on myself, unless I could justify it as necessary, and even then, it had to benefit the children and not me. In my journey to self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-love, I have learned so much about myself, and I guess I thought I had put my past behind me. I was wrong.
The Truth Always Prevails
If I know anything about the journey, we are all a work in progress- there is no finish line, no destination, and you have the power to make the right choices. Your life, your choice. That was so far from what was demonstrated by other women in my life.
Now, I recognize the Truth: We are not meant to be abused, misled, or mistreated- this is not the way of the Universe.
Take a deep breath and take that in.
Forgiveness
My experience, I now understand, was abuse used as a way to control me, and I bought into it for 30+ years. It is time to let that s@#$% go. It is time to forgive.
I am on a journey that includes practicing forgiveness. Forgiveness has been a challenge for me because of the past. Forgiveness. I find that it is so much easier to extend to others than to myself.
Name It, Claim It, Let It Go
Divine showed me how, even though I am no longer in that relationship, I held on to the abuse. I was reliving the abuse-a form of self-abuse. It hit me with such sorrow that I could no longer ignore it. Today, I can honestly say no more. I am done allowing this message to dictate what I can and cannot do or say. In releasing the old habits that have kept me small and invisible, I choose me.
Ho’oponopono Prayer
I invoke the Ho’oponopono prayer and end this self-abusive behavior.
I am sorry Patricia, for perpetuating the abuse you endured so many years ago. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you.
I am sorry Patricia, for not taking care of you. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you.
I am sorry Patricia, for not accepting that putting my needs first would allow me to be a better me. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you.
I am enough. I am worthy. This is my new beginning. I am ready.
Click here to learn more about the Ho’oponopono Prayer.
Until next time…
All the Best,
Patricia
